Well, I am deciding to blog more. Hopefully on a daily basis. I just need a little accountability and more interesting things to say. I will work on it. However, today is a special day...
My sweet little brother, Tyler Charles Stridde, is turning SEVENTEEN! i'm officially old.
This sweet boy has been bringing joy to my life for his whole entire seventeen years of life. He has a precious heart. He is sweet and sensitive and has a huge heart for others and for the Lord. He is just a little ball of sunshine. He has a giggle that is contagious. He has a smile that is full of life. And to top it all off, he's just a stud.
He is the one who will come and snuggle in my bed with me when i'm having a bad day. We used to build forts and nap in them. He used to play barbies with me. I used to play video games with him. One morning we tried to wake up at 5:30 to run before school...I made it about a half mile. He pushed me further. We kept each other sane when Jordan left for college.
He lets me take lots of pictures with him. We sit through weddings and boring graduations together. We would sled down the stairs in sleeping bags until one of us would get hurt and start crying. Once my older brother got engaged it always felt like we were on a double date with mom and dad, Jordan and Abby, so we decided to call ourselves TK4L (Team Kid 4 Life). Now that he is older and has lots of money, he takes me on sibling dates. He's the best.
People say we look alike. I just embrace it. I look like a 17 year old boy.
I'm spoiled and blessed with the best little brother in the world.
The other day I was talking to one of my friends about this semester. I mentioned how school is hard for me because I don't necessarily want to be here. Don't get me wrong, I am so incredibly thankful for where I am and that I am getting a degree. What kind of degree? That is to be determined. I know the Lord wants me here right now. I am thankful for that. I am thankful for my incredible community. I am thankful for what I am being taught. And lets be honest, I have a pretty fun life.
But at the same time I want to be there. I don't actually know where there is, but I am more and more aware of how ready my heart is to go when the Lord tells me to. I want to be in Guatemala hugging Luis or Elle. I want to be in Jamaica with Ne-yo snuggling in my lap or Kishmar chasing me down the hall. I want to sit in the orphanage floor and let the kids pull and "style" my hair. I want to tickle Usain and Emmanuel and hear them giggle and fight me until they have no fight left and I can squeeze them tight and kiss them on the cheek and let them know that they are loved. I want them to know that their Daddy loves them.
My heart hurts.
It hurts that these kids don't have mommy's or daddy's to squeeze them and kiss them.
It hurts that they have been abandoned.
It hurts that they are not wanted.
It hurts that they feel the pain of loss.
It hurts that they are alone.
But God is faithful.
He is the almighty Father and He showers them with kisses.
He will never abandon them.
He wants them more than anything.
He restores and brings healing.
He is always with them.
I am so thankful that we are not orphans, because we have been adopted into the Kingdom of heaven. Praise the Lord for that. I am anxiously awaiting the day when I get to go back and hug these kids and tell them that they are not orphans, because their Daddy loves them.
A big piece of my heart is thousands of miles away, but I am working on being present and focusing on what the Lord is teaching me in this time. He is good. alllllllways.
and plllllease try and tell me that these faces don't melt your hearts..